Move Beyond What's Holding You Back
You carry a quiet voice inside, a shadow lurking in the corners of your mind, whispering doubts just as you are about to step into your own power. It tells you that you are not ready, not worthy, not capable. It nudges you to procrastinate on dreams, avoid opportunities, or settle for comfort while your heart quietly aches for more. This voice is self sabotage. It can feel like it is part of who you are, yet it is only a pattern, a loop of thoughts and habits that keeps you safe yet trapped, like roots tangling your feet in the forest of your mind. The first step toward freedom is gentle awareness. The moment you pause, notice these loops, and shine a soft light on them, you begin to untangle them, one careful, tender step at a time.
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Self sabotage often hides in plain sight. Imagine walking through a dense forest at dawn. Sunlight streams through the leaves, painting golden streaks across the mossy ground. Birds sing softly in the distance, and the air smells of damp earth and possibility. You try to walk forward, but roots and low-hanging branches tangle around your feet. Every step you take, you stumble, trip, or get caught, pulling you back even as you reach toward the clearing. These roots and branches are your fears, doubts, and old habits. They are not you, yet somehow they have entwined themselves around your intentions, making it hard to move freely toward your dreams.
The roots of these patterns often grow from deep places in the past. Childhood messages, cultural expectations, past failures – all whisper…
"You are not enough."
Slowly, they weave themselves into the fabric of your mind, forming loops that feel unbreakable. But the forest is not your enemy. It is a place of learning. Awareness is your lantern. Once you shine light on these tangled roots, you can see where you are stuck, and begin to move through the undergrowth with clarity and care.
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Becoming aware of the loops is the doorway to freedom. Self sabotage thrives in the corners of our mind that go unnoticed. It hides in procrastination that stretches into weeks, in the last-minute panic that sabotages opportunities, and in relentless self-criticism that cuts deeper than anyone else could. To dissolve these patterns, we must observe them closely. Notice when you feel resistance, fear, or hesitation.
What triggers it?
Is it recognition, responsibility, intimacy, or simply taking the next step toward a dream?
Keep a small journal of these moments. Writing them down is like mapping the forest floor – you begin to see the roots and branches that once seemed invisible.
Trace the thoughts that drive your self sabotage. Every behaviour has a thought behind it.
Did you avoid sending that message because you felt too tired, or because failure feels safer than success?
Did you hesitate to speak up because you feared judgment, or because familiar comfort seemed safer than risk?
Mapping these thoughts is like tracing the roots in the forest. The more clearly you see them, the less power they hold.
Feel the feelings that arise. Fear, shame, restlessness, or inadequacy often fuel the loops. Sit with the tightness in your chest, the flutter in your stomach, the unease in your mind. Name it. Breathe into it. Allow it. By acknowledging your emotions, you stop them from unconsciously running the show.
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Let me tell you a story of a potter named Maya. Every morning, her hands hovered over fresh clay, soft and full of possibility, the kind of clay that could bloom into elegant bowls, soaring vases, or intricate sculptures. Yet each time she began, tension gripped her. She would coax the clay into shapes of breathtaking beauty, only to smash it with one sharp motion at the last moment. "I'm not enough," she muttered, day after day, as the fragments lay scattered like broken promises. One evening, her mentor paused beside her wheel and said gently, "Maya, the clay is not against you. It is echoing your fear. If you quiet your mind and move with it, it will reveal the truth your hands already know." That night, Maya inhaled deeply, let the tension soften in her shoulders, and allowed the clay to dance with her rather than resist. Slowly, hesitantly, trust blossomed in her hands, and the clay transformed under her touch. Self sabotage is like that clay. It resists the force of shame, yet when met with awareness, patience, and gentleness, it bends, flows, and becomes something extraordinary.
Breaking self sabotage is not about dramatic overhauls. It is about small, intentional acts of courage. Interrupt the loops when you notice them. Say, "That is the pattern again," and step back. Naming it creates space between you and the habit. That space is freedom. Replace self criticism with curiosity. Instead of asking "Why do I always fail?" ask "What is this fear protecting me from?" Celebrate every small victory.
Did you finally send that intimidating message?
Did you take a tiny step toward a dream?
Each of these acts rewires the mind and strengthens courage. Visualise yourself stepping past the roots and branches, moving freely toward the sunlight. Imagination trains your brain as much as action.
Photo by MEHEDI HASAN ( KΛΛSH ) on Unsplash
Self sabotage dims your authentic light. Every loop of procrastination, avoidance, or self criticism is like a fence around your deepest yearnings. Living authentically means walking toward your desires even when the old patterns whisper that you should not.
Imagine yourself as a river in the forest.
Roots, branches, and fallen leaves may block your flow, but water does not curse the obstacles. It finds a way around, over, or through them. Awareness and gentle action are your current. The river moves because it remembers its purpose: to reach the open sky. And so will you if you keep flowing.
I can walk with you through the dense forest of your mind, helping you gently notice the patterns that quietly control your steps. Together, we can shine light on the fears hiding behind the loops and create ways to move through them with care rather than struggle against them. You do not have to face this journey alone. With awareness, patience, and deliberate guidance, you can find your path through the undergrowth and step into spaces of possibility you may have thought were out of reach. We will uncover the authentic you. The part of yourself that has always longed for more, that deserves the dreams waiting just beyond the old habits. With each step, you will feel lighter, freer, and more connected to your true life, moving through the forest with courage, tenderness, and a renewed sense of purpose.
Breaking free is not a distant dream. It begins with the first conscious breath, the first noticing of a loop, the first gentle act of courage. Every recognition of a sabotaging thought, every pause, every intentional step is a rebellion against the old patterns. Every time you allow yourself to move forward with love and patience for yourself, you come closer to living authentically, fully, and unapologetically.
The forest is dense, the roots are tangled, yet the path is waiting for you. Step by step, with awareness, tenderness, and persistence, you can walk through it and emerge into the sunlight of your own life. Your liberation is possible, and it begins here, now, with the conscious choice to honour yourself and your dreams.
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About the Author: Mrunalni Bagal
